I walked along that street, oblivious to the sweat on my forehead and upper lip, loving the sunshine and the periodic breeze. But what I loved more was watching my son walk with purpose towards every house. Towards every mailbox. Towards wherever he could place one of those purple and white envelopes. He insisted on... Continue Reading →
I sat there watching it flutter ever so slightly… down, up, down, up… Brief inhale, long exhale. Quick to capture the air, slow to let it go. So soft and sweet I almost held my breath for fear the motion of his chest would stop. All would be paralyzed. I’d panic. Remember to beat, my heart.
I thought I heard the rain again. It’s pitch black and I don’t remember the forecast predicting anything other than 60s but it’s raining. The light clapping sound on my roof and the slapping off my backyard concrete, proof. So I decided to bring my trusty laptop outside and talk to you. 😊
In fact, I think I realized it the first day I felt one coming on and shuffled my legs back against the coffee table and then slid down to a seating position. We were just playing ball (well, rolling it back and forth- let’s not exaggerate our abilities) and I let the ball roll past me and sat down. He walked to me, squatted down...
They say a baby will shake up your life and my little man did just that- in more ways than one :) I always knew the possibility that even before he got here, there would be tests as to how strong the two of us would be together. Well, we made it, but not without a few bumps and bruises and nights of making deals with God to keep my baby safe no matter what my body threw at me.
With any change in life, the one constant affected is mood. Our feelings- joy and heartache, confidence and uncertainty, optimism and defeat. It’s a rollercoaster. Some experience a Disneyland sort of ride… long and winding with a few jerks and bumps. While others hold on for Magic Mountain…
I thought it was the perfect bonding moment– Nolan and I at the OC fair; his first time – and we "won" a goldfish. Obviously, I expected this since it’s basically happened from the beginning of time. Every single fair insists on blessing each visitor with a fish.
Number 2. No, not THAT number 2 ;) but a second baby. When my husband and I had our first, we said we’d try again when Nolan turned a year old. Here we are, D-day, and I can’t “pull the trigger." One, I don’t know how I’ll be able to love another one as much... Continue Reading →
(Know that I realize I’m very fortunate to be able to go through a pregnancy and these are my experiences/thoughts. Everyone is different.) They say a baby will shake up your life and my little man did just that- in more ways than one :) I always knew it would be a possibility that even before... Continue Reading →